Interactive transcript · 209 lines
Hello, everyone.
大家好。
Welcome back to TalkCastSpeaking, your favorite spot for making English practical, natural, and fun.
欢迎回到 TalkCastSpeaking，这里是你将英语变得实用、自然且有趣的最爱场所。
I'm Emma, your host, and I've spent over 15 years helping learners find their confident voice in English.
我是你们的主持人艾玛，我花了15年多的时间帮助学习者在英语中找到他们自信的声音。
Today, we are tackling a topic that makes almost everyone sweat a little.
今天，我们要处理一个让几乎每个人都有点冒汗的话题。
Yes, we are talking about how to disagree with someone without making an enemy.
是的，我们正在讨论如何在不树敌的情况下与他人不同意。
And to help us navigate this tricky social water, we have a very special guest.
为了帮助我们应对这片棘手的社交水域，我们请到了一位非常特殊的嘉宾。
Please welcome Brian, an account manager at a tech company.
请欢迎布莱恩，一家科技公司的客户经理。
Welcome, Brian.
欢迎，布莱恩。
Hi, Emma.
嗨，艾玛。
Thanks for having me.
谢谢你邀请我。
Oh, man, you are so right.
天哪，你太对了。
Just hearing the word disagree makes my heart beat a little faster.
只要听到“不同意”这个词，我的心跳就会稍微快一点。
To be honest, I'm a bit of a people pleaser, especially at work.
老实说，我有点讨好型人格，特别是在工作场所。
Whenever I have to disagree with my team or, heaven forbid, my boss, my mind just goes completely blank.
每当我不得不与我的团队或者（天哪保佑）我的老板持不同意见时，我的大脑就会完全一片空白。
That is incredibly common, Brian.
布莱恩，这极其普遍。
Nobody wants to be the bad guy in the room.
无人想成为房间里的坏人。
But did you know that in English -speaking cultures, expressing a different opinion is actually
但你知道吗，在英语文化中，表达不同的意见其实是
highly valued?
高度重视的吗？
It's all about how you do it.
这完全是关于你如何去做。
Tell me, Brian, what do you usually say when you don't agree with someone in a meeting?
告诉我，布莱恩，当你在会议上不同意某人的观点时，你通常会说什么？
Well, in my head, I translate directly from Chinese.
嗯，在我的脑海里，我从中文直接翻译。
I think, wo butong yi.
我认为，wo butong yi。
So I just open my mouth and say, I don't agree.
所以我只是张开嘴说，我不赞同。
Or sometimes even, I think you are wrong.
或者有时甚至，我认为你是错误的。
But every time I say that, the room goes completely quiet, and I feel this icy breeze blow through
但每次我这么说时，房间就会变得完全安静，我能感觉到一阵冰冷的微风吹过
the meeting room.
会议室。
It's so awkward.
这太尴尬了。
Ah, the famous icy breeze.
啊，那场著名的冰冷微风。
You've hit on a classic cultural and linguistic barrier here.
你在这里触及了一个经典的文化和语言学障碍。
Let's analyze this.
让我们分析一下这个。
When you say, I don't agree, or you are wrong, with a flat tone, it sounds like a verbal slap in the face.
当你用平淡的语气说“我不赞同”或“你错了”时，听起来就像是在脸上挨了一记口头耳光。
It's too blunt, too direct.
这太生硬了，太直接了。
In English, we use what we call cushions or softeners to protect the other person's feelings before
在英语中，我们使用所谓的缓冲垫或软化剂来保护另一个人的感受，在
we present our different opinion.
我们提出我们不同的意见之前。
A cushion?
一个缓冲物？
Like a soft pillow?
就像一个柔软的枕头吗？
That sounds exactly like what my meetings need. Exactly.
这听起来完全符合我的会议所需。确实。
A conversational cushion.
一个对话的缓冲物。
It softens the impact of your disagreement.
它减弱了你不同意见的影响。
Let's look at our first set of basic cushions.
让我们来看看我们第一套基本缓冲垫。
Instead of jumping in with, I don't agree, you can start with a partial agreement or validation.
与其直接插话“我不同意”，你可以从部分同意或认可开始。
For example, I see your point, but...
例如，我明白你的意思，但是……
Or, I understand where you're coming from. However...
或者，我理解你的出发点。然而……
Oh, I see your point, but...
哦，我明白你的观点，但是……
That sounds so much friendlier.
这听起来要友好得多。
It feels like I'm saying, hey, I hear you.
这感觉就像我在说，嘿，我听到了。
You're not stupid, but let's look at this other side.
你并不愚蠢，但让我们看看另一面。
Spot on, Brian.
完全正确，布莱恩。
You are validating their contribution first.
你首先是在确认他们的贡献。
Let's practice the pronunciation of, I see your point, but...
让我们练习“我明白你的观点，但是……”的发音。
Notice how we link the words.
注意我们是如何连读这些单词的。
We don't say, I see your point, but...
我们不说，我明白你的观点，但是...
We say, I see your point, but...
我们说，我明白你的观点，但是...
With a slight rise in tone on, but...
在‘但是’上语气有轻微的上升...
To signal that more information is coming.
为了暗示将会有更多信息。
Try it after me.
试着跟我读。
I see your point, but...
我明白你的观点，但是...
Let me try.
让我试试。
I see your point, but... Perfect.
我明白你的观点，但是……完美。
Beautiful intonation.
优美的语调。
Now, let's look at another very common cushion.
现在，让我们看看另一个非常常见的缓冲语。
This one is great for formal situations.
这个非常适合正式场合。
I'm afraid I have a slightly different take on this.
恐怕我对这一点有稍微不同的看法。
The key word here is slightly, and the phrase, I'm afraid.
这里的关键词是 slightly，以及这个短语 I'm afraid。
In this context, I'm afraid doesn't mean you are scared of spiders.
在这种语境下，I'm afraid 并不意味着你害怕蜘蛛。
It's a polite way of saying, I'm sorry to say this, but...
这是一种礼貌的表达方式，意思是‘很抱歉这么说，但是……’
Ah, I'm afraid.
啊，我恐怕。
I've heard my British colleagues use that a lot.
我听过我的英国同事经常这样用。
So, I'm afraid I have a slightly different take on this.
所以，恐怕我对这一点有稍许不同的看法。
Is take like opinion here?
这里的 take 就像是观点吗？
Yes, exactly.
是的，完全正确。
A take on something is your perspective or opinion.
对某事的 take 就是你的视角或观点。
And by adding slightly, you are making the disagreement look tiny.
通过加入 slightly，你让这种分歧显得微不足道。
Even if you actually disagree completely, it's a brilliant linguistic trick.
即使你实际上完全不同意，这也是一个绝妙的语言学技巧。
It reduces tension instantly.
它能立即缓解紧张气氛。
Wow, that is so clever.
哇，这太聪明了。
So, instead of saying, your marketing plan is bad, I can say, I'm afraid I have a slightly different
所以，与其说‘你的营销计划很糟 ’，我可以说‘我恐怕有一个稍微不同…’
take on the marketing plan.
对该营销计划的看法。
That sounds incredibly professional, Emma.
听起来非常专业，埃玛。
It really does.
确实如此。
You're getting the hang of it already.
你已经掌握要领了。
Now, let's step it up a level.
现在，让我们提升一个级别。
Sometimes you don't just want to cushion your disagreement.
有时候你不仅想缓和你的分歧。
You want to present it as a useful tool.
你想把它呈现为一个有用的工具。
Have you ever heard the idiom to play devil's advocate?
你听说过‘扮演魔鬼代言人’这个习语吗？
Devil's advocate?
魔鬼代言人？
Like working for the devil?
就像为魔鬼工作一样吗？
No, I haven't heard that one.
不，我没听过那个。
What does it mean?
它是什么意思？
It's a wonderful phrase.
这是一个美妙的短语。
To play devil's advocate means to pretend to disagree with an idea or to take the opposite side,
扮演魔鬼代言人意味着假装不同意某个想法或站在对立面，
just to test if the idea is truly good.
只是为了测试这个想法是否真正好。
It allows you to disagree without being seen as a negative person.
它允许你表达不同意见，而不会被看作是一个负面的人。
You are just doing it for the team's success.
你这么做只是为了团队的成功。
Oh, I love that.
哦，我很喜欢这个。
So, it's like a shield.
所以，这就像是一个盾牌。
I can say, let me play devil's advocate here and then say my real objection and nobody will think
我可以先说，‘让我在这里扮演一下魔鬼代言人’，然后说出我真正的反对意见，没有人会认为
I'm personally attacking them. Precisely.
我在人身攻击他们。正是如此。
You can say, just to play devil's advocate, what happens if our budget gets cut next month?
你可以说，‘只是扮演一下魔鬼代言人，如果我们的预算下个月被削减了会怎么样？’
See how that shifts the focus from your plan is too expensive to let's prepare for a worst case
看看这如何将焦点从‘你的计划太贵了’转移到‘让我们为最坏的情况做准备’
scenario together?
一起探讨这个情境吗？
That is a total game changer for me.
对我来说这绝对是个重大的改变。
It sounds so constructive.
听起来很有建设性。
Let me try using it in a sentence.
让我尝试在句子中用一下它。
Just to play devil's advocate, do you think we have enough time to finish this project?
恕我直言充当反对者，你觉得我们有足够时间完成这个项目吗？
How was that? Incredible.
刚才怎么样？简直不可思议。
You nailed it, Brian.
你这次干得漂亮，布赖恩。
That was 100 % natural.
这百分之百自然。
Now, let's address a common grammar mistake that many English learners make when disagreeing.
现在，让我们来解决一个许多英语学习者在表达不同意见时常犯的语法错误。
Some people say, I am not agree with you.
有些人会说：“我不是同意你。”
Have you ever said that, Brian?
布赖恩，你曾经说过这样的话吗？
Uh, yes.
呃，是的。
Guilty as charged.
供认不讳。
I think I say, I am not agree at least three times a week.
我想我至少每周会说三次。
Is that wrong? Yes.
这不对吗？是的。
It's a very common grammatical slip up.
这是一个非常常见的语法小失误。
Let's do a quick correction.
我们来快速纠正一下。
Agree is a verb, not an adjective.
Agree 是一个动词，而不是一个形容词。
So we don't say, I am not agree.
所以我们不能说 I am not agree。
We must say, I don't agree or I disagree.
我们必须说 I don't agree 或者 I disagree。
Remember, I disagree is the verb form.
记住，I disagree 才是动词形式。
Let me say that again.
让我再次重复一遍。
I disagree or I don't agree.
我不同意或者我不赞同。
Never, I am not agree.
绝不能说 I am not agree。
Oh, right.
哦，对哦。
Because agree is a verb like run or eat.
因为 agree 是个像 run 或 eat 一样的动词。
I wouldn't say, I am not run.
我不会说 I am not run。
I would say, I don't run.
我会说 I don't run。
That makes perfect sense when you explain it with a basic verb comparison. Exactly.
当你用基础动词作对比来解释时，这就完全说得通了。确实如此。
Connecting it to simple grammar concepts is the best way to remember.
把它和简单的语法概念联系起来是最好的记忆方法。
Now, let's look at another idiom that is very useful when a disagreement just can't be resolved.
现在，让我们来看看另一个习语，当分歧实在无法解决时非常有用。
Sometimes you talk for an hour and neither person is going to change their mind.
有时你们谈了一个小时，双方谁也不肯改变想法。
In that case, what do we do?
在那种情况下，我们该怎么办？
Usually we just stop talking and feel frustrated, or we keep arguing until someone gets angry.
通常我们只会闭口不言并感到沮丧，或者一直争吵到有人生气为止。
Well, there is a much more elegant way out.
嗯，其实还有一个更加优雅的解决方法。
We use the phrase, let's agree to disagree.
我们用这个短语：保留意见，求同存异。
This means we both have different opinions.
这意味着我们双方有不同观点。
We respect each other, but we are not going to convince each other.
我们互相尊重，但并不打算说服对方。
So let's move on to the next topic.
所以我们进入下一话题吧。
Let's agree to disagree.
我们保留不同意见吧。
Oh, that is incredibly polite and peaceful.
哦，这真是极其礼貌又平和。
It feels like a handshake at the end of a friendly debate.
感觉就像在一场友好辩论结束时的握手。
It really is.
确实如此。
It saves so much time and energy.
这节省了大量的时间和精力。
Now, let's put everything we've learned today into a little role play scenario.
现在，让我们把今天学的一切用到一个小角色扮演场景中。
Imagine we are colleagues at a coffee shop chain.
想象我们是一家咖啡连锁店的同事。
I suggest that we should stop selling hot coffee during the summer and only sell ice drinks.
我建议我们夏天应该停止出售热咖啡，只卖冰饮。
You think this is a terrible idea because many customers still love hot lattes.
你觉得这是个糟糕的想法，因为许多顾客仍然很喜欢热拿铁。
How would you disagree with me using our new freezes?
你会如何用我们学的新表达来不同意我呢？
Ooh, okay.
哦，好吧。
Let me think.
让我思考一下。
I need to cushion it, maybe use slightly different take or devil's advocate.
我需要缓和一下，也许用稍微不同的看法或唱反调。
Let me give it a shot.
让我尝试一下。
Go for it, Brian.
冲吧，布莱恩。
I'll start.
我来开始。
Hey, Brian, I really think we should stop offering hot coffee this summer.
嘿，布莱恩，我真的觉得我们今年夏天应该停止提供热咖啡。
It's too hot outside and we'll save money on cups.
外面太热了，而且我们能在杯子上省下钱。
I see your point, Emma, but I'm afraid I have a slightly different take on this.
我明白你的意思，艾玛，但我恐怕对此有稍微不同的看法。
Just to play devil's advocate, what about the customers who work in offices with very cold air conditioning?
只是扮演魔鬼的辩护者，那些在冷气很足的办公室工作的顾客怎么办呢？
They might still want a hot latte to stay warm.
他们可能还是想要一杯热拿铁来取暖。
Oh my goodness, Brian, that was absolutely flawless.
天哪，布莱恩，那简直是完美无瑕。
You use the cushion, I see your point, but transition to I'm afraid I have a slightly different take
你用了缓冲语‘我明白你的意思’，但过渡到了‘我恐怕对此有稍微不同的看法’
and then successfully introduced just to play devil's advocate to make your point.
然后成功地引入了‘只是扮演魔鬼的辩护者’来表达你的观点。
How did that feel?
那感觉怎么样？
Wow, that felt amazing.
哇，那感觉极好。
It didn't feel confrontational at all.
一点也没有对抗性。
It felt like we were just working together to solve a problem.
感觉我们就像是在解决一个问题。
I didn't feel any of that typical anxiety.
我没有感受到那种典型的焦虑。
And that is the power of pragmatic language strategies.
这就是务实的语言策略的力量。
You are not fighting the person, you are exploring the idea.
你不是在与人争辩，而是在探索这个想法。
You've made huge progress today, Brian, from I don't agree to a master of diplomatic disagreement.
你今天取得了巨大的进步，布莱恩，从‘我不同意’变成了委婉表达分歧的大师。
Thank you so much, Emma.
非常感谢你，艾玛。
I can't wait to try these out in my meeting tomorrow.
我迫不及待想在明天的会议上试一试。
My boss won't know what hit him.
我的老板会不知所措。
In a polite way, of course.
当然，是以礼貌的方式。
Yes, in the most polite way possible.
是的，以最礼貌的方式。
Well, everyone, that brings us to the end of today's episode.
好了，各位，这就到了今天节目的尾声了。
Let's do a quick recap of the core points we covered today so you can remember them forever.
让我们快速回顾一下今天涵盖的核心要点，以便你永远记住它们。
Can I do the first one, Emma?
我来做第一个可以吗，艾玛？
Please do, Brian.
请吧，布莱恩。
Show our listeners how it's done.
向我们的听众展示一下这是怎么做到的。
First, never say, I am not agree.
首先，绝不要说，我不同意。
Agree is a verb.
Agree 是一个动词。
So say, I don't agree or I disagree.
所以要说，我不同意或者我不赞同。
But even better, don't be too direct. Excellent.
但更好的是，不要太直接。太棒了。
Second, always use a cushion to soften the impact.
第二，总是使用缓冲语来减轻冲击。
Phrases like, I see your point, but...
诸如‘我明白你的意思，但是……’这样的短语……
Or, I'm afraid I have a slightly different take on this.
或者，‘我恐怕对此有稍微不同的看法’。
Are your best friends.
是你的好朋友。
Third, use the idiom to play devil's advocate when you want to present a different side of an idea
第三，当你想要展示一个想法的不同侧面时，使用‘扮演魔鬼的辩护者’这个习语。
as a constructive test.
作为一种建设性的测试。
And fourth, if you really can't agree, end the debate gracefully by saying, let's agree to disagree.
第四，如果你真的无法达成一致，通过说‘让我们求同存异吧’来优雅地结束辩论。
What a fantastic lesson.
多么精彩的一课啊。
I feel so much more confident now.
我现在感到自信多了。
You did an incredible job today, Brian.
你今天做了一项出色的工作，布莱恩。
To all our listeners out there, try using at least one of these phrases this week.
致所有的听众朋友们，这周尝试使用这些短语中的至少一个吧。
The best way to learn is by doing.
学习的最佳途径就是实践。
If you enjoyed this episode, please consider subscribing, sharing our podcast with your friends, and
如果你喜欢这一集，请考虑订阅、与你的朋友分享我们的播客，以及
joining our Talkcast Speaking membership for more exclusive materials.
加入我们的 Talkcast 英语口语会员，获取更多专属资料。
We deeply appreciate all your support and feedback.
我们深表感激大家的每一个支持与反馈。
Before we go, please leave a comment in the comment section and tell us, what oral English topic
在我们离开之前，请在评论区留下一条评论并告诉我们，接下来想让我们探讨什么英语口语话题
would you like us to cover next?
你们希望我们接下来探讨什么？
We choose our topics directly from your suggestions.
我们直接根据你们的建议来选择主题。
Until next time, keep practicing, keep smiling, and we'll talk to you soon on Talkcast Speaking.
直到下次，保持练习，保持微笑，我们很快就会在 Talkcast Speaking 上与大家交流。
Goodbye, everyone.
再见，大家。
Thank you.
谢谢你。
Thank you.
谢谢你。
Thank you.
谢谢你。
Thank you.
谢谢你。
